7 Things I Learned After a Week in the Hospital

1 There are a lot of nurses with pretty face. I was confined in a local hospital on my hometown and to tell you, all the nurses attended to me were all good-looking. I don’t know if it’s just one of the qualifications to be hired but honestly, I enjoyed it whenever a nurse checks on me.

2 My veins are too small. This is my first time to be admitted in a hospital for as long as I can remember. I had 18 liters of dextrose and my arms really swelled up that they had to move the iv catheter to another vein thrice.

3 Hospital food isn’t too bad. Well, maybe it depends on the hospital. But mine was fine, it’s just that I can’t eat a lot due to my sickness.

4 Antibiotics injected on skin is too painful. Yes, to the point that I really cried.

5 I could still joke around despite the pain. Since my Mom is the only one to watch over me in the hospital and because I wanted to somehow forget the pain I’m in, I used anything I could use to throw a punchline. And it worked, my Mom’s always laughing.

6 It’s fun to talk to other patients. I could go like, “Hey, how are you? Why are you here?” and they would throw me the same questions and that would be the start of the conversation (whenever I could).

7 Life is beautiful. Being in a hospital, I witnessed patients who almost died and who refused to treatment due to finances, heard of patients who’ve been brought to the ER due to fatal road accidents and so on. As for me, my experience is kinda painful and weakening. I lost pounds of weight, cc’s of blood, my platelets count dropped, almost had an oxygen tube put on me, too many needles and syringe, always throw up after I eat, had to take medicines that taste like hell, had to see my Mom cry because of seeing me in pain. After all these, I realized that life is beautiful. That we have to take care of ourselves for us to enjoy the life that God has given us, free from worries that your life would be taken anytime due to sickness or accident due to carelessness. Let us live life as we should be, take care of this gift given to us, share our lives with the people entrusted with our love, because I think, it is the least that we could do.

On Choosing to Let Go and Let God

I admit. I am a worrier. I can’t help but think about the things that might happen if, for example, I lost my job or didn’t receive my salary on time or overspend. I am always anxious about my finances to the point that ‘money matters more’. I think about my tithes, my debts, my siblings’ tuition fee, my family needs (financially), my apartment rent, the bills to pay, the monthly groceries and daily work allowance. I was always bombarded with the thought of expenses and not savings.

Until one hell of a situation happened that really tested my faith. I’ve withdrawn everything from my ATM and spent for this and that and those and gave everything to my Dad with 500 peso left in my wallet expectant that the other day, I would get my sales incentive from the company (funny, right?). I got back to Manila and had only 300 peso to spend for at least two weeks before the next salary. I was very hopeful that I will be provided for the first week. But then the first week passed and I had only a hundred peso left in my wallet. I don’t even know how I managed to survive (thanks to my housemate and to a church mate). I was financially broke the following week but then I managed to budget the remaining cash I have even though I commute to work everyday. Thank you, Lord for the grace and wisdom! But still, I DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY LEFT and the next salary is 3 days away and I still don’t have my incentive. One thing I forgot to do that whole week is to pray for myself and to pray for provision when I should be the one to never forget that. I was already upset and asking God what could be wrong and why of all situation, why now, why this? Why can’t I even feel blessed enough? I was already having the wrong drive and intention to my prayers, I am already sounding like demanding and unsatisfied despite the fact that He made me survived for two weeks already. Then my church mate called me. “Let go and let God. You’ll see, He will just surprise you immeasurably.” I listened. I let go. I stopped worrying and just waited for God to surprise me.

He did. He surprised me with more than I’ve expected. One of my faith goal is to be financially debt free this year and to start saving for a house for my family. I am really impatient but then God is always faithful. It is still the first quarter of the year but the vision I had is coming to life. Yes, I am now financially debt-free and had opened a new bank account for my family’s dream house. Isn’t it amazing? It has been declared in our church that this year is a year for greater things. I believe so and I am seeing and experiencing it already. God never fails and I pray that the blessings I’ve received and continually receiving will also bless others.

Next Chapter

My life has always been an open book. I’ve been sharing a lot about myself, whereabouts and what-not online – through this blog, on Facebook and Instagram. Some of you may have read the poems I made, the rants I posted and everything that this thing called life had given me. All of it, I accepted with open heart and embraced every change they caused me.

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As I open a new book and as God writes the next chapter of my life, I am preparing myself for a greater adventure – for greater responsibilities, new places to go to, new people to meet, emotions to handle and of course, to new poems, stories and a lot more words, phrases, lines to be published and shared on this blog. My heart and mind are ready to be blown away and to be overwhelmed! Bring it on.

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And to all the people who have been part of my life and will be part of my life, thank you and welcome. I would always look forward to the moments we will be sharing together. I hope and pray that you wouldn’t be tired of me and somehow I’ll be one those good things that would happen to you. 😉

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So, I guess this is a happy birthday. I planned so many things but then I know that God has always something better; those that I truly deserve. As I unfold this new chapter, I’ll open it with a brighter smile, a hopeful heart, a deeper love, and beautiful soul. ❤

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